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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25244605">In the Dead of Night</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bumblingbumble/pseuds/bumblingbumble'>bumblingbumble</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Downton Abbey</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ambiguous/Open Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Homophobia, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mentions of War, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 04:40:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,022</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25244605</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bumblingbumble/pseuds/bumblingbumble</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Only Thomas knows about Jimmy's terrible nightmares.</p><p>Post Season 3, Episode 7.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>82</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>In the Dead of Night</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>As usual, none of the very not fantastic views presented by a certain individual are shared by me. Some homophobic language lies ahead.</p><p>I'm sure there's a good reason why I keep writing about the boys crying, but today is not the day to explore that...</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The night began with screaming.</p><p>Thomas’ eyes opened. He sat up in bed and listened.</p><p>Another scream struck through the silence. He recognised it immediately.</p><p>A moment later, he was stepping out into the hallway. The screams were continuous now, a staccato of violent waves. At the same time as he, Carson entered the hallway and glared at Thomas. Short of running, Thomas dashed to Jimmy’s bedroom door and grabbed the door handle.</p><p>‘Mr Barrow, you will do no such thing.’ Carson thundered, ‘<em>I</em> will see to this.’</p><p>Thomas stared at the man as the screams grew louder.</p><p>‘Mr Carson, I know what this is about. He won’t want anyone to see him.’</p><p>Carson’s eyebrow raised, ‘Given your recent transgressions, Mr Barrow, I do not believe- ʼ</p><p>‘Mr Carson!’ The older man jumped at Thomas’ raised voice, stunned into silence before Thomas went on, ‘You have to let me. You have to trust me, just once.’</p><p>By some miracle, Carson nodded slowly, conceding. Hesitating no longer, Thomas let himself inside.</p><p>Papers crunched under his foot. Upon brief inspection, Thomas realised it was sheet music. The room swayed with yellow light as the bedside lamp rolled back and forth on its side on the floor. Uniform lay strewn like detached limbs. The bed cover twisted in violent contortions on the mattress, half hanging from the frame. In the middle of the scene, was Jimmy.</p><p>Clutching his head in his hands, Jimmy’s body shook as if every particle in the air was attacking him. He sat with his back pressed forcibly against the wall, directly under the open window, knees pulled up to his chest, his breathing loud and ragged. His toes curled as though something might emerge from the floor and tear him to pieces.</p><p>Thomas daren’t move much closer, even as he fought the urge to descend on the young man and hug him until he burst. He glanced at the door behind him and back at Jimmy.</p><p>‘Jimmy?’</p><p>‘Fuck off!’ Jimmy screamed with gritted teeth.</p><p>‘It was a dream, weren’t it?’</p><p>‘Fuck. Off.’</p><p>Thomas’s eyes prickled, but he blinked hard and lowered himself to the floor, sitting with crossed legs.</p><p>Before that night, before Thomas had ruined everything and before Jimmy had begun his unwavering campaign to hate him, Jimmy had once told him that being alone turned his nights into gruesome horror shows. The nightmares didn’t show up often and though Thomas avoided him asking what they were about, he had enough of his own to know it wasn’t worth reliving.</p><p>‘D’you know where you are?’ Thomas asked quietly.</p><p>Jimmy’s grip on his scalp appeared to tighten.</p><p>‘Jus- just fuckin’ leave me alone, or I swear I’ll fuckin’ kill you, I swear- I-I’ll scream and Carson-‘</p><p>‘Carson knows I’m here.’</p><p>At that, Jimmy finally raised his head a fraction. Thomas caught sight of shadowed eyes under his curled hair and guarding arms. They glared at him. Light from the now motionless lamp sparked against drying tears on his cheeks and nose.</p><p>‘I told him you wouldn’t want anyone seein’ you when you’re like this, just like you told me.’ Thomas continued calmly, though his mouth was dry and he had to stop himself from checking the door every second.</p><p>Jimmy mumbled something. Thomas ignored him.</p><p>‘So, do you know where you are?’ he repeated.</p><p>‘Yes.’ Jimmy spat.</p><p>‘Tell me.’</p><p>‘Me bedroom.’</p><p>‘Where’s your bedroom?’</p><p>‘Attic.’</p><p>‘And?’</p><p>Jimmy huffed, ‘Downton Abbey, Downton, Yorkshire, England, the fucking world.’</p><p>Thomas nodded, ‘Alright then.’</p><p>Holding his breath, Thomas waited and watched as Jimmy’s breathing slowed from rabid to deep and full. A sharp, cold breeze shot through the window, lifting the curls on Jimmy’s head. Thomas almost smiled but stopped himself in time. Jimmy lifted his head and wrapped his arms around his knees. He maintained a watery, scowling glare, his eyebrows lowered. Thomas sighed. At least Jimmy was as alright as he could be now. Stiffly, Thomas got to his feet and brushed down his pyjamas.</p><p>‘You alright?’ he asked.</p><p>No answer.</p><p>‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’</p><p>At that, Thomas headed for the door. If the last few months were anything to go by, then this would be the final exchange they would have for a long time. He reached for the door handle.</p><p>‘Wait!’</p><p>Thomas whipped around as if pulled by a string. Jimmy raised his head fully, clawing his shoulders, his eyes as wide as the moon in the window.</p><p>‘Don’t… don’t leave me here… I’m sc-… what if it comes back?’</p><p>Thomas would have cut his chest open and handed Jimmy his heart if he’d asked. He swallowed thickly and looked down at Jimmy, mouth downturned. His heart ached. He looked so young. Too young to have seen the things he’d seen.</p><p>‘Are you sure, Jimmy?’</p><p>‘Yeah.’</p><p>He nodded a reply and walked back over.</p><p>‘You stay over there.’ Jimmy blurted, gesturing to a spot at least two metres away, ‘Don’t come any closer.’</p><p>Sitting once again, Thomas tried not to show any sadness in his face, schooling his features into unreadable blankness. His occupation came with perks sometimes. He tried not to shiver either, his mind wandering to the open window. Glancing at Jimmy, he saw the goosebumps and strained muscles in the young man’s arms, biting his tongue. The room was dropping temperature quickly, yet Jimmy seemed adamant on not moving.</p><p>‘This don’t mean we’re mates. You’re still disgusting.’ Jimmy sneered.</p><p>‘I know,’ Thomas said, adding under his breath, ‘you’ve made that abundantly clear.’</p><p>‘Good.’</p><p>‘D’you want to talk about it?’</p><p>Jimmy’s eyes narrowed. Every muscle in his neck tensed.</p><p>‘About what?’</p><p>‘The nightmare.’</p><p>‘Oh,’ said Jimmy, visibly relaxing, ‘I dunno.’</p><p>Thomas shrugged, ‘You don’t have to, just sometimes it can help.’</p><p>‘Christ almighty.’ Jimmy sighed heavily, rubbing his face, ‘How are you, the local fucking lavender, the best I’ve got?’</p><p>Thomas gritted his teeth and reminded himself that a raised voice would bring Carson, which would mean searching for a new job before they booted him. Leaning forward on his elbows, Thomas massaged pain into his deformed hand.</p><p>‘Why am I here then?’ Thomas demanded, ‘Why not kick me out and fetch Alfred?’</p><p>‘I’m not sittin’ awake the whole night with that brainless twonk.’</p><p>‘You know that’s not what I’m asking.’</p><p>Jimmy replied with a scowl as bitter as the wind. Thomas’ gaze moved to the window. In the time he had been in the room, the sky had taken on an opaque density, moonless and starless, releasing smatterings of rain that spotted the wood floor. He looked back to Jimmy, now shivering but trying to hide it by digging his nails into his bare arms.</p><p>‘Stop starin’ at me.’</p><p>Thomas winced and snapped his gaze away, ‘Sorry.’</p><p>‘You should be.’</p><p>The words sunk into Thomas’ skin. He let them sit, heavy and scorching, like a brand that he had no choice but to accept.</p><p>‘D’you mind if I close the window?’ he asked carefully.</p><p>‘Oh, so you can- ʼ</p><p>‘For fuck’s sake James, it’s fucking freezin’ in here and you’re shiverin’. I’m closing the window.’</p><p>He got up and closed the latch as softly as he could, all without looking down at Jimmy. When he sat down, Jimmy had his forehead resting on his arms. Thomas’ irritation dissipated and his stomach sank as he sat down again. He was being weak and letting Jimmy melt him, as usual.</p><p>Jimmy mumbled something into his arm that Thomas couldn’t hear.</p><p>‘What was that?’ he asked.</p><p>Jimmy lifted his head a fraction before saying, ‘Thank you.’</p><p>Pattering rain filled the air. Thomas closed his eyes for a moment and let his mind wander into the uncountable sounds. As much as he loved unforgiving sunshine, he also loved storms in equal measure. Anything in between was a waste of a day. A smile crossed his face and he opened his eyes. The sight of Jimmy staring listlessly into nothing brought him back down.</p><p>His brow furrowed as he wondered how long Jimmy would need him. It was selfish that he wanted to be needed, yet he couldn’t help the urge to protect the young man rising up his throat. Thomas forced himself to focus on the foot of Jimmy’s bed, but out of the corner of his eye, he watched him. He couldn’t protect him if Jimmy didn’t want it, and without even a friend, he would be alone. It was selfish. Then, the guilt. His face remained empty and passive as he recoiled internally over the memory of the night he had thought going into Jimmy’s bedroom, doing that idiotic thing.</p><p>‘You might not want to hear this,’ Thomas said quietly, ‘but I am sorry about what I did.’</p><p>Risking a glance, Thomas caught Jimmy frowning, puzzled. Thomas certainly didn’t see what was so difficult to understand, but then again, Jimmy’s rapid mind tended to flood with emotions before there was time to even think. As Thomas watched, Jimmy’s face flooded red. Thomas held his breath as every muscle in his body tensed.</p><p>‘You’re right,’ Jimmy said, ‘I don’t want hear that. I don’t care.’</p><p>Thomas gulped and nodded, ‘I understand.’</p><p>‘No, I don’t think you do.’</p><p>‘I’m sorry.’</p><p>‘It doesn’t matter. You’re just some queer, not my friend. Nothin’ you say now matters.’</p><p>Thomas closed his eyes.</p><p>‘Don’t call me that.’</p><p>Jimmy snorted, ‘Yeah, and what are you- ʼ</p><p>Suddenly, Thomas was on his feet. His hands curled into fists, but they came apart, hanging uselessly by his sides. Thomas forced himself to meet Jimmy’s eyes. His jaw clenched.</p><p>‘Do not call me that.’ he said quietly, ‘I’m a human fucking being. I’m exactly the same as you.’</p><p>‘But- ʼ</p><p>‘I am not foul. I am not disgusting.’ Thomas took a deep breath, ‘I am not a monster.’</p><p>Jimmy glared. His bottom lip quivered. He tilted his face to look up at Thomas, eyes narrowed.</p><p>‘Do you know why I’ve hated you?’</p><p>Thomas remained silent.</p><p>‘I’m scared.’ Jimmy said bluntly.</p><p>Cold dread ran up Thomas’ spine.</p><p>‘What?’ he rasped.</p><p>Something in Jimmy broke right in front of him. The final shred of indignant resolve smashed like glass.</p><p>‘I’ve hated you and you’re still here, looking after me- and then before you were my friend, and then… then…’ Jimmy choked as sobs wracked his body, ‘I was sleeping. You came in and you… I was fucking sleeping!’</p><p>Jimmy bowed his head as Thomas sank to his knees.</p><p>‘Oh my God.’ he murmured as that night replayed in his head, ‘Oh God…’</p><p>Jimmy lifted his head, his blue eyes glistening and innocent for the first time that night, focused on Thomas like he was staring into a light.</p><p>‘Thomas?’</p><p>It was the cracked softness of Jimmy’s voice that broke him. His vision blurred with tears as the full realisation blew through him. His lips parted. His fingers dug into the floor so hard his bones ached. He had hurt Jimmy. He had made his best friend fear him. He blinked slowly and fresh tears rolled down his face.</p><p>‘I am so sorry.’</p><p>He heard Jimmy sniff.</p><p>‘I know. I forgave you ages ago.’</p><p>‘You’re right to hate me.’ Thomas insisted, shaking his head.</p><p>‘Didn’t you just hear me?’ Jimmy raised his voice a fraction, ‘I forgave you.’</p><p>Here he was, crying and sniffing pathetically, his mind begging for time to reverse itself and for Jimmy’s hurt to vanish. Even better, would be for Jimmy’s fear and pain to become his own, to take it away from him. They remained metres apart.</p><p>‘Thomas?’</p><p>Jimmy’s voice brought him back into the room. Jimmy shoulders shook as he gasped through each sob, ‘I don’t want to be alone.’</p><p>‘Just tell me what I can do, and I’ll do it.’ Thomas said, sounding stronger than he felt as the tears on his face dried.</p><p>‘I’m just- I’m scared, Thomas!’ Jimmy pleaded.</p><p>‘I know, you are, swe- I know.’</p><p>‘N-not of you, not now, of the- ʼ Jimmy gasped, ‘They’re never gonna go away. I’m stuck with this, this shit in my head and I can’t…’</p><p>Thomas bit the inside of his mouth and made a decision. Without making too much noise in an attempt not to startle Jimmy, Thomas got up and crossed the room, sitting himself beside Jimmy, though still a foot away.</p><p>‘What can I do?’ Thomas repeated calmly.</p><p>‘I… I don’t know.’</p><p>Jimmy’s face crumbled. He pressed the heel of his palm into his temple. Thomas’ heart broke.</p><p>‘Jesus, Jimmy…’</p><p>There was nothing to say. This, Thomas realised, was what he had gone through the night he had decided to raise his hand over the top of the trench, except there was no one there with him. No one was by his side to stop him or feed him false promises that he would be alright, that the death and carnage would fade. That had been the worst part of doing the deed; being alone.</p><p>Jimmy leaned into him and he almost froze, but pushed his doubts away. Thomas shifted around and hugged Jimmy to his chest as the younger man broke down, fingers clinging to his undershirt. Stroking his back, Thomas squeezed him tight and shut his eyes.</p><p>‘I’m- I’m so sorry, Thomas, I- ʼ Jimmy stammered into his chest.</p><p>‘Stop that.’ Thomas retorted gently.</p><p>‘I don’t hate you.’ Jimmy whispered.</p><p>Jimmy repeated the phrase over and over, his voice fraying as Thomas held him closer. Inside, Thomas could only how they had ended up like this, and how helpless he truly was to make this all go away for Jimmy. He opened his eyes and let himself be absorbed by the ticking of a clock and the soft, quietening whimpers coming from the man in his arms. Thomas lifted his un-gloved hand and placed it to the back of Jimmy’s head.</p><p>‘You’re safe now. Nothing can happen to you here.’</p><p>‘I don’t think… any of those things I said about you.’ Jimmy stammered between sniffs, ‘I mean, I did- I used to, but… n-none of it’s true.’</p><p>Thomas smiled to himself as Jimmy’s breathing slowed, though the younger man didn’t move from his spot. Absently, Thomas rested his chin on Jimmy’s head and looked at the clock. Seconds ticked liked tiny steps. Jimmy’s breath flowed in and out of the seconds like thread.</p><p>‘Thank you, Jimmy.’</p><p>‘Christ, Thomas, don’t thank me for- for doin’ nothin’, I’ve been ruddy horrible!’</p><p>‘No.’ Thomas said softly, ‘You’ve been scared.’</p><p>Jimmy stayed silent, neither confirming nor denying the truth. Instead, he huffed and turned his face into Thomas’ chest and brought his clenched hands closer towards his body.</p><p>‘I’m sorry for scaring you.’ Thomas muttered.</p><p>‘You don’t scare me.’</p><p>Afraid to ask what he meant, Thomas continued holding his body, gaze lingering from the clock to Jimmy’s golden hair, to his curled hands and arms, to his bunched-up shoulders retaining signs of terror. Thomas sighed and wished they could stay like this for a while longer.</p><p>‘You should try to sleep soon.’</p><p>He felt Jimmy nod. Reluctantly, he untangled himself from Jimmy’s warm arms. The cold returned as he helped Jimmy up and got to gathering the stray sheets of music and putting the fallen lamp in its rightful place while Jimmy settled himself in bed. As he moved around the room, he felt the pressure of Jimmy’s gaze on him, though he supposed this was just because Jimmy didn’t want to be on his own yet. Thomas placed the sheets on the dresser and turned to Jimmy. He had pulled the duvet up to his chin, gripping onto it so hard that his hands shook. Not wanting to scare him, Thomas knelt beside the bed.</p><p>‘I can stay until you drift off?’ he offered.</p><p>He smiled as Jimmy scoffed, ‘Don’t think Carson will be happy if you’re dead on your feet in the mornin’.’</p><p>It had been the morning for two hours, but Thomas didn’t point it out in fear of making Jimmy feel guilty. Yawns and a scolding over breakfast was more than worth getting his friend back, even if that’s all they were. Thomas grinned and listened to the silence for a moment. No creaks or clunking doors of anyone sneaking about. He would get a few hours’ sleep.</p><p>‘You can have tomorrow off. I’ll arrange it with Carson.’</p><p>If he’d had more energy, he knew Jimmy would object on the basis of a whole day off being as boring as polishing boots if he couldn’t go out anywhere. Sleepily, Jimmy mumbled in agreement, barely able to keep his eyes open. The deep frowns and scowls were long faded. Curls rippled over his forehead and his eyelids blinked slowly. Thomas sighed and stood up, going to the door.</p><p>‘Goodnight, Jimmy.’</p><p>He didn’t feel empty as he closed the door behind him, nor did emptiness hit him like the sudden realisation of a gaping wound. As Thomas lay himself down in bed, staring up into the darkness, he breathed in deeply, as though the air was sweeter now. Nothing was fixed yet, not really, but the light had come back to him. He turned on his side and shut his eyes.</p><p>A muted creak alerted him to someone entering his room. Thomas groaned, unwilling to open his eyes when he had just gotten so comfortable, but opened them nevertheless.</p><p>‘Thomas?’</p><p>He lifted his head at the sight of Jimmy standing over him and frowned. As he began to sit up, Jimmy shook his head and raised his hands.</p><p>‘Don’t do that.’ Jimmy whispered quickly.</p><p>Confused, Thomas sat up anyway and rubbed his eyes.</p><p>‘What you doin’ here?’ he mumbled.</p><p>‘I…’ Jimmy hesitated, ‘I need… Uh, never mind, sorry.’</p><p>‘What? No, wait, what’s the matter?’</p><p>His words halted Jimmy halfway to the door, who turned back to him with his eyes glued to the floor. Worry rose in Thomas’ chest. Through the dark, he couldn’t make out Jimmy’s face clearly, but the way he seemed unable to hold his head up and look him in the face said something was wrong.</p><p>‘I keep… I keep seeing those… things.’</p><p>‘Oh. I can come back- ʼ</p><p>‘No, no you have to sleep too! I- I don’t know how to ask this. I don’t know if it’s right.’</p><p>‘You don’t have to worry about that, just take your time.’ Thomas said smoothly, keeping his voice low.</p><p>‘It’s just when you were there, I didn’t see it all.’ Jimmy spoke to the floor, his hands clasped and fidgeting, ‘Can I sleep in here?’</p><p>Thomas tried not to gape but failed. He was thankful for the night clinging on as it did, hiding his gormless expression.</p><p>‘You mean-?’</p><p>‘Yeah. I’m sorry. I’m just… I’m really scared.’</p><p>Inside, he swore and squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. Carson would publicly execute him if he or a hall-boy came in at the wake-up call and found them. Thomas would save Jimmy and go to prison.</p><p>As he opened his eyes again, he said, ‘Of course, you can.’</p><p>Without another word, Jimmy padded over as Thomas held back the duvet for him. The side of the bed at Thomas’ back was to the wall, so he shifted himself as far as he could, his back flush with the cold surface. Jimmy climbed in but remained at the edge of the mattress, lying on his side to face him. Heart galloping, Thomas couldn’t look anywhere but Jimmy’s downcast face. He glanced at Thomas, the muted moonlight glinting in his eyes.</p><p>‘I don’t want you to be- uh… uncomfortable.’ Jimmy said.</p><p>Thomas wrestled down a laugh, ‘Look where we are. I think we’re past that.’</p><p>That earned him a smile and he was sure Jimmy had turned bright red. Jimmy bit his lip, both in thought and maybe to stop himself giggling out loud like Thomas wanted to. Thomas tugged on the duvet. He shivered, but that also soon changed.</p><p>Jimmy inched himself right up to him, snuggled his nose into the crook of Thomas’ neck like a hedgehog. His fingers searched the soft materials surrounding them until they found Thomas’ shirt and clung to it. Thomas reminded himself to breathe. Shakily, he tried to breathe and relax and not panic all at once.</p><p>‘It was so hard not talkin’ to you.’ Jimmy murmured into his shirt.</p><p>Thomas hummed a reply while wondering how the hell he was going to fall asleep. Yet, Jimmy was as warm as coal smouldering in a fireplace. He desperately needed sleep, but he couldn’t take his eyes on the pale gold hair and strong shoulders before him. Jimmy came because he needed him. Distracting him from the horrors was his purpose for now.</p><p>‘I never wanted it to go so far,’ Jimmy continued, ‘and then I didn’t know how to stop anymore.’</p><p>Thomas knew he should probably change the subject, steer himself out of the mire, but he couldn’t stop himself.</p><p>‘I missed you.’</p><p>‘I know.’</p><p>He could hear the smile in Jimmy’s voice, to his relief. Just as he began to relax, Jimmy lifted his head from his shoulder, meeting Thomas’ eyes. Gulping, Thomas held his tongue. If he opened his mouth now, he was likely to do something incredibly stupid. He ignored the pain in his back from curving over Jimmy like this, the fluttering in his stomach, and the music of Jimmy’s breathing so close to his face.</p><p>‘I was seein’ bombs explodin’.’ Jimmy’s words hung in the dark like the moon. Thomas didn’t dare speak as Jimmy paused and memories twisted his mouth and drew a numbing blanket over his eyes, ‘It was night and there was fire everywhere. When it woke me, they kept on explodin’ behind my eyes, so I threw stuff at ʼem… and then you came in and it stopped.’</p><p>As Jimmy pressed his forehead into Thomas’ shoulder, Thomas wrapped his arm over Jimmy and pulled him in.</p><p>Jimmy mumbled, ‘You probably think I’m mad or somethin’.’</p><p>‘Not remotely. I met so many men goin’ through this, it’s normal.’ Thomas replied immediately, maybe too immediately, but if it was obvious that Thomas’ heart was racing or that sweet nothings danced on the tip of his tongue, then Jimmy didn’t say anything, ‘Thank you for telling me.’</p><p>‘I trust you.’</p><p>‘You do?’ Thomas asked, unable to hide his surprise.</p><p>He felt Jimmy smile.</p><p>‘Don’t have much of a choice now, do I?’</p><p>Chuckling, Thomas shifted onto his back as the twinge in his spine protested and muttered a quick apology to Jimmy.</p><p>Pale grey light poured through the three windows above their heads. The house wouldn’t come alive for another three hours, but Thomas knew the day would be hellish. That didn’t matter, as Jimmy nestled himself on top of Thomas, his head resting on the spot just below his collar bone. His breathing was slow and deep. One arm curled into his own chest and the other lay over Thomas’ stomach and clutched at his side. Thomas couldn’t see his face, but after a few minutes of motionlessness, he believed Jimmy was finally asleep.</p><p>Weaving his fingers through Jimmy’s hair, he massaged his scalp for a few moments, causing Jimmy to tighten his hold around his middle. Thomas, as overjoyed as this made him, couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness attached to it in knowing that Jimmy’s nightmares wouldn’t just leave. If his own experiences were anything to go by, they would linger on and appear less frequently, but never truly fade.</p><p>There was nothing he could do. He looked down at a tranquil Jimmy and smiled. Then, he craned his neck and placed a feather light kiss on top of his head and hoped that at least for now, nothing terrible was hurting him.</p><p>A long, sleepy sigh escaped from Jimmy’s mouth and he snuggled further into Thomas’ side.</p><p>‘At least I’m awake this time.’</p><p>Thomas stopped breathing. Horror filled his lungs.</p><p>‘Thomas, I’m joking.’</p><p>Letting his head fall back on the pillow, Thomas wrapped his arm around Jimmy’s shoulders and squeezed his arm.</p><p>‘You bastard.’</p><p>Jimmy’s body shook as he cackled into Thomas’ shirt.</p>
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